robert turner

One of my favorite things to do on the web is to go into a car company’s web site, head straight to their configurator and build something. Sometimes it will be a stripper, just the basic car to see how cheap I can build it. And more times than not, I go all in adding every option to see how far I can take it to the other extreme. I try different colors, different interiors, different wheels and I spare no expense on the performance options. If you are going to build something, you may as well go big. Right?
I love me some Porsches! Owned eleven of ‘em (and counting). But you know what? I’ve never bought a new one. The Turner master plan says I get to do that at some point in my short life on this revolving globe. Thinking back to the Brand Loyalty series I wrote a couple of weeks back, you know I’ve got to get my boys out of college, propped up and on their own. Could take years. It’s funny, I even remind them from time to time (like weekly), that they’re holding me back. I am joking here, but just barely. 
Point is, I love the Porsche configurator. I build cars on it all the time, like maybe 2-3 times per month. OK, maybe 3-4 times per month. But that’s all I’m admitting here. I build Carrera’s (mostly Turbos and GT3s), Boxsters, Caymans (especially Caymans; love ‘em), Cayennes (just in case we end up needing a new one), Macans (because they are awesome), Panameras (have you read my action-adventure novels? They factor somewhat in the story line), and 918’s (cause they are stupid crazy and it’s fun to see if you can configure one to $1,000,000—yes with reversed pinky held to mouth, Dr. Evil style).  
I will build one, giggle and say to my wife, “hey I built a new Porsche, wanna see it?” She’ll glance over at me, with a sideways look, glasses lowered to her nose, and ask if I went all in this time or not. No I will proudly exclaim that I built an inexpensive Cayenne - for her. Does she want to see it? Then she’ll ask if it is like the other dozen I have “built” for her lately and not getting her sarcasm, I’ll say this one is different. (Yeah, it’s red.) Sometimes she looks, sometimes she doesn’t and she reminds me (for like the thousandth time) that we’re not doing anything before the aforementioned boys are out of school, cars paid off, bills paid off, ETC. Oh yeah—heard that one before. So then, what the hell, I’ll reconfigure the car as a Cayenne Turbo S with every option under the sun. $180K! Yeah, that’ll show her!
The mouse hovers over the “get a quote from your dealer” button and as usual, I do not press it. But man, I wish I could. I know that day will come, that perfect moment when I will be able to press that button and talk to the dealer, to build my dream Porsche. I can feel it coming in a three-to-four-year-off kinda way. See I have infinite patience when it comes to waiting for my ultimate car. I’ve got to, I only get one shot.

And on that exhaust note, see you all next time. 


image sources: http://www.porsche.com/usa/
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Robert Turner is the author of The Driver, a series of six novels your editor in chief finds intoxicatingly engaging and superbly written; Book I— Decision and Book II— Training are currently available hereHe also has a blog entitled My Life with Porsches. Robert can be contacted at pcarfan@gmail.com.

 


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